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THE SUGARMAN SAYS

 If you wait by the river long enough, eventually you will see the bodies of your enemies float by

In this country you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power, and then when you get the power you get the women”. 

Well, Newcastle United Chairman Freddie Shepherd certainly has the first two, and if scuttling around the globe rattling prostitutes counts, then I suppose in some respects he also has the third. It’s an interesting little quote that. You might recognize it from a film you’ve no doubt seen. 

Craig Bellamy faces Newcastle today for the first time since his unceremonious exit from St. James Park. Don’t get me wrong, not for one second am I a fan of the welsh firebrand. He personifies everything wrong with the archetypical modern day top flight footballer. 

Egotistical, mediocre, cocky, arrogant and with enough money to choke your average donkey, Bellamy has deserved 99% of all criticism which has came his way in recent years. However, today’s clash with his old nemesis Graham Souness has the Sugarman, and armchair fans up and down the country wincing in anticipation. 

“Say ‘ello to my little friend” says Mark Hughes as he re-acquaints the former Scotland captain with the diminutive bundle of anger from the valleys. “Hey, I think I wanna have a heart attack” says Souness, as he taps his pacemaker, knowing in a cruel twist of fate Bellamy could be 90 minutes away from returning the favour and booting his old boss through the exit door. 

In signing Michael Owen, Shepherd has said to Souness, “there you go, maybe you can handle yourself one of them first class tickets to the resurrection?” but it looks like it’ll be Bellamy (not for the first time) might have the last word. He must be looking at the league table today, the precarious position of his old boss, and be thinking to himself “This is paradise, I’m telling ya, this ‘toon’ is like a great big pussy waiting to get fecked”

Have you worked out the film yet? All the quotes in bold above are from Brian De Palma’s 1983 classic gangster flick ‘Scarface’. 

 
 

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Craig Bellamy still owns property in the north east. His £2.5 million ‘mansion’ is yet to attract a buyer despite a massive reduction in the asking price. Why? Well apparently it’s all to do with the Welshman’s ‘individual’ taste in interior décor. 

Bellamy reportedly spent thousands having the house kitted out to look exactly like Tony Montana’s Miami pad from the aforementioned movie. Complete with flamboyant marble and a ridiculously over sized staircase, Bellamy’s drum is a must have for any millionaire Scarface fan with no sense of style and a huge misconception of their own importance.

 “Money, money, money, money, money, that’s all I ever hear in this house” Again, the Scarface quotations and Bellamy appear beautifully intertwined. “Eh Feck you man, who put this thing together? Me! That’s who, who do I trust me! I don’t need him, I don’t need her, everything is roses I don’t need nobody!”

Anyway, whilst I respect Graham Souness for finally showing the balls needed at Newcastle to get a grip of the likes of Bellamy, Robert et al. its fast becoming clear to Magpie fans what most neutrals suspected long ago. 

Souness is devoid of ideas, frequently pays over the odds for mediocre players and now that trigger happy Freddie appears to have him firmly in his sights only one outcome seems inevitable. How ironic that the one thing Graham Souness did that most people stood up and applauded could end up being the one thing that finally undoes him. Graham Souness got rid of Craig Bellamy, he got rid of the scarface loving ‘bad guy’ and ran him out of ‘Toon’. 

I’ll leave the last word to brain De Palma and Tony Montana…or was it Craig Bellamy?

"Whattaya lookin' at? You're all a bunch of fecking assholes. You know why? 'Cause you don't have the guts to be what you wanna be. You need people like me. You need people like me so you can point your fecking fingers, and say "that's the bad guy." So, what dat make you? Good? You're not good; you just know how to hide. Howda lie. Me, I don't have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth--even when I lie. So say goodnight to the bad guy. Come on; the last time you gonna see a bad guy like this, let me tell ya. Come on, make way for the bad guy. There's a bad guy comin' through; you better get outta his way!" 

mind how you go……

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